Forget Sidney

One circus, the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey show, just left town. Later tonight, following a game near Miami, another circus, the Pittsburgh Penguins, comes to town.

As a hound, I know I should be excited about this. It's a team full of stars -- young and old: Sid the Kid, Evgeni Malkin, Jordan Staal, Gary Roberts, Sergei Gonchar and Petr Sykora. There's also players like Colby Armstrong, Georges Laraque and Ryan Whitney. It's what I call a target-rich environment.

But, for that reason alone, I can't wait for it to be over. Teams like Pittsburgh, and players like Crosby and Malkin, are gigantic draws. Every collector, myself included, and, unfortunately, every dealer will be out in full force on Thursday, hoping to add, respectively, to their collections or, in the cases of dealers, their wallets.

That's where it gets difficult.

As a collector, I merely want to add autographed items from big-name players. If I don't, well, there's always the next trip. And the trip after that. And the trip after that. Sooner or later, it'll happen. I just can't way when or where, but we'll get them for our collection.

The know-little dealers, though, have to get these items. If not, they don't make money. That's why some scrounge up local drop-outs, hand them a 16x20 team/arena picture and put them to work. Then again, who am I to question how someone else makes a living?

Still, the Penguins will likely draw 40-plus people Thursday morning. At least 25 will be dealers. I'll let them go first.

Last season, we tried twice to get Crosby to sign Colin's Penguins #87 jersey. Both times, Crosby came close, but someone else in the scrum got the autograph. One time, it was a man, in his 50s, who was staying at the team's hotel. Just as it looked like Crosby would sign Colin's jersey, the man slipped his jersey in front of Colin.

Needless to say, this man soon had a 350-pound-plus bee buzzing in his ear as he hurriedly walked back to the hotel. Somehow, his trembling tale that the jersey was for his grandson fell on deaf ears. Trust me, it wasn't my finest moment.

Crosby, too, has some complicity in these scenes. Though his on-ice skills compare favorably with Wayne Gretzky, the kid, as well as his young mates, could learn one trick from the Great One: Have everyone line up, with one item each, and just sign his/their way down the line. Sounds simple, doesn't it?

Because that's unlikely to happen, I'm taking a different approach with the Penguins. Low expectations will rule the day. There are plenty of other players filling the Penguins roster. For every Crosby, there a Erik Christensen. For every Malkin, there's a Brooks Orpik. For every Staal, there's another three Staals.

However, if a small group or one-on-one situation presents itself, I'll be prepared for it. Colin's Crosby jersey, the one he wanted to get signed last season, is packed.

C'mon, Sidney, it'll take only 15 seconds.